The Other AI: Anxiety-Inducing

From deer in headlights to AI-ing

Earlier in my career, I remember when GitHub was released. For those unfamiliar with it: GitHub does for code what SharePoint does for documents; it tracks versions and changes.

In my corner of the software industry, I’ve witnessed reluctance to adopt it. I was a fledgling back then, eager to learn new technologies. Growing up playing DOS games, I thought the GitHub terminal was cool. As I glanced over at a more senior engineer, they looked like a deer in headlights.

I still vividly recall that blank stare, struggling to process the difference between fetching, pulling, and rebasing code.

As a fledgling, I felt proud of myself learning GitHub terminal. Thinking back, I was insensitive and judgmental of that engineer who seemed to freeze on the concept of it.

Fast forward to now…

There’s AI.

And everyone is saying we’re inching closer to career doomsday.

Now that I’m more senior, I’m realizing I’m the deer in headlights.

Being older and stuck in my ways of software development, it was earth-shattering for me that AI could simply build applications from a prompt.

I’ll admit I wasn’t initially a “champion” for change. I’m not sure I’m one now either.

But I paused and wondered:

Why was I so hesitant?

Why wasn’t I excited to learn it?

And why did I feel so unsettled when thinking about AI?

It’s because of fear… the fear of being left behind

Fear of Uncertainty

My fear of AI was not just about being left behind on a social trend. This wasn’t about being hip. This was about survival. My 15+ years of software experience, the foundation of my livelihood, suddenly felt like it had an expiration date.

And the industry wasn't exactly making it easier to breathe. Articles constantly talk about how our jobs will be eliminated in the next 6 months to a year. What makes it harder is that the uncertainty isn’t shared equally. Some people in this industry can afford to watch AI unfold with curiosity. Meanwhile, the rest of us are counting down the years until retirement and doing the math on our mortgages. I’ve spent 15 years thinking of myself as a craftsman. And now anyone can do it.

I realize I have become the villain from the Pixar movie, Ratatouille.

“Anyone can cook”?… Aaabsolutely.

“Anyone can code”?… Pish-posh... Blaasphemy.

At some point I had to be honest with myself. I can’t swim against this wave. The only thing I can control is me. So I stopped feeling sorry for myself and started moving.

Like anything in life, emotions become helpful ONLY when you stop and listen to them.

Why was I angry about AI?

Because it took away my comfort zone.

Why was I afraid of AI?

Because of the threat of becoming obsolete.

Problem Solving Anxiety

As I was piecing together my fragmented thoughts, I looked back on that moment decades ago, when GitHub was first dropped. An unfamiliar technology, a senior deer in headlights, and a fledgling who didn’t know enough to be afraid.

What made the difference then?

And did that answer still apply now?

For me, it was simple. I wasn’t afraid. I was young, curious, and had nothing to lose. Fear can freeze you from taking action. It can stifle curiosity before it even gets started.

But that senior engineer learned it too, just differently. They leaned on what they already had: years of experience, resourcefulness, and the ability to break something overwhelming into smaller pieces. Gradual exposure. Stack Overflow rabbit holes. The same skills that made them senior in the first place.

So then I turned to my existing strengths. I, too, relied on my resourcefulness. I created smaller tangible goals. Each new concept or mini-project is exposure therapy.

Slowly, the freeze started to lift.

Whether you're excited about AI or anxious like me, my advice is:

Build a relationship with AI

AI is here to stay. If you are afraid of being left behind, let that be the motivation to learn it.

As a software engineer, I felt AI was taking something from me. My value, my edge, my identity. If you feel the same, then let’s “take that power back” together.

For me, I started with the most minimal effort needed, watching a lot of YouTube videos while on the toilet. From there, I’ve built several applications with the help of AI. I also experimented with MCPs, plugins, and prompt engineering. There was effort indeed, but the biggest hurdle was myself.

Start wherever you are. The bar is lower than you think.

Somewhere out there, that senior engineer who froze at the GitHub terminal is probably fine. They might be retired actually... Lucky… And if the GitHub terminal could feel that overwhelming, I can survive this too.

I’m still thawing out, but hey, I’m AI-ing now.